​​I am almost afraid to start writing, not knowing what will come.

I sit here reading over my prayer journal of the past 3 weeks. The emotions that are still so raw today. This has been a long three weeks.

NEW YEAR usually brings excitement of leaving the unwanted behind and forging ahead with a new vision, a new plan and a new motivation.
Until God steps in and says “Nope. We are not done with this season yet.”

 Not what I wanted to hear Him say, but I had to praise Him for stopping me from running out on my own!

I’m just going to put it out there…. the past 4 months have been HARD! Hard physically, emotionally and spiritually. Have there been amazing & divine moments woven in? Absolutely. But still just plain hard!

I injured myself which resulted in way too many doctors, medicines, tears and sleepless nights. Herniated disk in the lower back is a common issue, but a pain that is indescribable until you have it. During treatment for this, old man winter comes again. This means flares are much more easily to come with my fibromyalgia pain and chronic fatigue….and they come with a vengeance. And then, I get hit with the flu.
Here I am on Day 6 of the flu. I feel like I have been in the boxing ring without any protective gear. Physically and mentally, that is what I feel.
Spiritually, during this time has been good, awful, amazing & terrible. Yep, all of that.

But I want to share some Hope with you today. Some of that good and amazing stuff He has been doing in the middle of this mess.

Lessons I’ve learned in this hard season (so far):

1. Jesus is here. Always right beside us. He doesn’t leave because I am angry or complaining, but stays right here.
2. Jesus knows I am needy & whiny, but He WANTS me bringing it to Him instead of trying to deal with more than I was created to handle!
3. Jesus is ALWAYS GOOD! His plan is always best! Even when my mind tells me otherwise!
4. Jesus listens and knows my true heart. He doesn’t listen just to respond back or to reprimand. He listens so my heart can be poured out and refilled with His love instead.
5. Jesus knows when my emotions are getting the best of me. He knows when I am physically weak, my mind loses strength too. (He is working BIG TIME on this!)
6. Jesus knows that I need to be reminded that I am strong, but I also need to be reminded that I am weak in areas also.
7. Jesus NEVER shines His Light on my weak areas to bring shame or condemnation! (that would be the enemy!)
8. If I am a follower of Jesus, I cannot stay the same. I will be in a constant state of change. Some change will be nice and easy, some will be hard and hurtful at the time, but all for good.
9. Jesus only brings changes in us for us to become more like Him. To see Him, hear Him, and experience Him in ways we never could before.
10. Jesus shines the light on our dark areas that need change ONLY to overcome them & bring a freedom we could never imagine!
11. I will never be at peace outside of His will. PERIOD! No matter what I think, if HE IS ASKING, my job is to just be obedient. (He is always right 😊 )
12. And from this morning’s prayer time….If you continue to seek Him, asking Him to help you understand what is going on when you feel like you may be losing your mind, no matter how long it takes……the SWEETEST, BRIGHTEST RAY of Light will burst forth in the most unexpected way to show you a revelation of what He wanted you to see!

So, take this with you today. If you feel you are walking a path all alone, you are not! If you feel forgotten, you aren’t!  
Keep going to Him and hand it over to Him. Over & Over until the bright ray comes.
It is coming!
JESUS ALWAYS COMES!
 
Walking it with you,

​Have you ever awakened to a feeling of complete overwhelm? Almost as if you are being swept over by the huge waves over & over again and about to drown?

​There are days like that for all of us. At times, those days turn into weeks or months before we feel we can catch our breath again.

​BUT GOD...He sees. He knows. He is working even in these times, when we feel like He has abandoned us.

THAT IS NOT HOW GOD WORKS! He never leaves us.  He is always there, even if we can't see it or feel it. He promises this to us all throughout the scriptures.

 Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”​- Deuteronomy 31:8

​My friend, Laurie, is allowing me to share a personal story on this very matter. Laurie is a gifted writer and her heart is so set on Him that it pours out through her life and her writings. The more I get to know her, the more I love her and I think you will too!

Laurie writes:
This morning I woke up without the best outlook on life. I try to write down what's in my heart before I spend time with God. I do this because it is unreal how he will often speak to the details. That's the process of hearing from God. I used to think it was so complicated but it's totally not.

Journaling is saying to God, I believe you're going to talk to me. I believe it enough to get out my pen.

It seems the more faithful I've been to do this, the more I "hear" from Him....

This morning my words to God were...
"I feel a little bit like I'm drowning today"...and I proceeded to whine. I can do that with Him. 😉He gets me. (I'm sure somebody can relate to the drowning bit, right??!-sw)

I almost left it at that. I got up to start laundry and pour another cup of coffee and I thought, I can't leave it like this. I decided to "check my gauges" (the word, the Holy Spirit, Godly friends) and see what God had to say about where I was today. So I opened my devotion for today and began to read.

Before I could even finish reading the devotion, I had to write,"well God, you've done it again"...

The scripture reading with the devotional included....
As they sailed, he fell asleep. A squall came down on the lake, so that the boat was being swamped, and they were in great danger. The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm. “Where is your faith?” he asked his disciples. In fear and amazement they asked one another, “Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him.””     - ‭‭Luke‬ ‭8:23-25‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Needless to say, my perspective shifted and I am filled with faith and hope. And I'm reminded
"It is well 🎶...the waves and wind still know His name".

Check with God. He's in the smallest details of our life. Always ask him what he has to say about it. And when you ask, be ready to listen. Get your pen out!
​- Laurie Helton

​I know Laurie's story encouraged you too! I told her how great you all are :)
Give her a shout out today and let her know how much you loved it!